At least that's how I've felt for the past few weeks. I've barely heard a peep from my reach-out-and-touch-you friends. I didn't make any off-color remarks about them or clog their toilets or anything like that, so I don't know what the deal is.
Someone I know from a message board I post on was talking a few days ago about how he's at the point with this girl that he's known for 4 years that he's the one initiating all contact with her.
Once I thought about it, I realized that almost all of my friendships are like that. And these are people I've known for far FAR longer than 4 years. If I had to break it down, I'd say almost all of my friendships with people I know in "real life" are 90/10, and that's being generous. I have ONE friendship that I feel is 50/50 and they don't even live in the same state as me anymore.
It's just about to the point where the only way to see my friends is at the bar. Hey, I like going to the bar, but that's a bit much. I almost equate it to a pimp/whore (WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORES!) relationship, but with less smacking. At least when I'm there. I pay Party A X amount of cash to interact with Party B.
Have we all fallen into a certain rhythm where we know what to expect from one another? Is everyone else just so busy with their daily routines that a simple "hello" is out of the question? What can I do to change things? Can they be changed?
It feels good to get this out, but I still feel terrible.
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I think it just happens as we get older. My friends and I have had the same distance grow between us since right before I met my wife, and over the years it's only gotten larger. People fall into routines of "well so and so hasn't called and I'm too lazy to be the one calling them."
ReplyDeleteYeah, it makes sense but I don't like it. I've noticed it gradually with various people but I guess I just reached a breaking point. I'm over it now, but I will use it as a wakeup call for myself to avoid that path.
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